Monday, September 26, 2005

I love to puke after drinking

I almost forgot the relief that comes with puking one’s innards out after some heavy drinking. The last time I really vomited was months ago, when I downed barrels of tequila (or was it rhum?) mixed with Vishnu knows what. Intoxication makes bartenders of anyone, and it makes any mixture, however odd, taste sublime. That was also the time when I, in drunken stupor, proposed to woo one of my high school friends while Alona was cleaning up puddles of vomit on the floor and Cez was on all fours, claiming that she’s washing clothes. This whole bacchanalian exercise was caught on video, which I haven’t seen yet. I don’t know who the hell has a copy of it. They’d just probably show it during my funeral or something and have a good laugh at how goofy I had been when I was still alive. Yes, make fun of me, you assholes!

This time, though, what made me puke the morning after was just some cheap beer at a tacky joint with a confused and overworked videoke machine. Don calls it Hell. But Hell does not sell five bottles of beer for just a hundred bucks. That’s more like Heaven’s thing, if you would ask me.

Beer has never made me puke before, especially not that kind, which tastes just a bit better than water. This tells a lot about the deterioration of my drinking prowess. I should start flexing my liver muscles again so it can load up as much alcohol as it used to and perhaps gear up for more discussions on philosophies and beliefs; sex and lust; betrayals and trysts—stuff that drinking sessions are so rife with. I got home at six the next morning, reeking of beer-soaked morning reveries. A few hours after, I was face to face with the toilet bowl, unloading my angst with steady bursts of mush and digestive juices. And then came relief.

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16 Comments:

At 5:48 PM, Blogger rmacapobre said...

j'ai bu beaucoup de la bière quand j'étais plus jeune aussi mais maintenant (j'ai plus vieux), il ne me manque pas. veuillez corriger mes fautes svp

 
At 5:50 PM, Blogger weng said...

let's go wasted one of these days. =D

 
At 5:51 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

used to "neighbors" in the cube farm i call the stink tank, yet never got around to sharing a drink or two with you.... umiinom at sumusuka ka rin pala?

di bale, lets have one when we get to have one.

 
At 8:37 PM, Blogger transience said...

this is why i never drank again after my first bout with alcohol. i puked my guts out in a friend's house. major cringe factor. bleh.

 
At 9:49 PM, Blogger Saint Eroica said...

next time take 2 aspirins right after throwing up... i have another suggestion so you won't puke again... but i can't suggest it here... :)

 
At 10:03 PM, Blogger Sidney said...

i have another suggestion so you won't puke again... drink water ! :-)

 
At 3:30 AM, Blogger Nelson said...

also drink lots of water in between to hold whatever booze you have... i dunno, it worked for me :D

 
At 5:57 AM, Anonymous Anil said...

if I could get a dollar for every promise I solemnly made to myself to stop drinking after everytime I had a hangover/puked I'd still be a very poor man! yes, I know...weird mood mode happening...please excuse...

 
At 10:45 AM, Blogger bismuth said...

and the lucky friend was me, trans. the last time i puked was on the ultra-expensive shoes of professional basketball players. they must have found me adorable. i like getting drunk though. and this has given me an idea for my next entry. tnx!

 
At 2:06 PM, Blogger slim whale said...

RMACAPOBRE--Pourquoi as-tu arrêté de la boire ? C’est parfait pour tous, vieux ou jeune. La vie deviendra insupportable sans elle.

WENG--pourquoi pas? quand est-ce que tu es libre? organisons-le avec les autres camarades de classe.

ANONYMOUS--there was a time when alcohol used to run through my veins. i think i got to drink with your former boss in this "stink tank."

TRANS--the amount of your vomit is sometimes a measure of how much fun you had! don't stop drinking; puking is good. and besides, bismuth can always clean up the mess afterwards.

SAINT EROICA--what exactly does aspirin do? that other suggestion seems obscene, at the least.hehe email it to me.

SIDNEY--next time, i'd get drunk on water

NELZ--yes, i remember doing that one time. it helped me survive the night!

ANIL--i always swear to myself never to drink again after waking up wasted the next morning. but i still drink.

BISMUTH--next time you invite trans to a drinking spree, always have an empty pail ready.

their shoes cost more than my annual salary. i would love to puke on them like you did.

 
At 11:38 PM, Blogger Jay said...

Oh no. Come back, drinking prowess, come back!

 
At 10:26 AM, Blogger slim whale said...

JAY--it's like losing one's libido!

 
At 10:51 AM, Blogger Abaniko said...

did you drink on an empty stomach? that's usually the reason for puking easily.

 
At 10:56 AM, Blogger slim whale said...

ABANIKO--no, not really. i just had dinner. i feel i've had one too many. or, i'm really losing my touch. should drink more often.

 
At 2:04 PM, Blogger bing said...

that's one thing i wouldnt miss and wouldnt love after drinking - puke! thank my system it had survived the tests of wine & liquor, i puked only once - the first time i tried brandy.

 
At 10:31 AM, Blogger slim whale said...

BING AKA JULIET--oh but it's such a joy to puke after drinking. sheer catharsis! i just hate the smile afterwards. and the bitter taste it leaves in your mouth.

i don't dig brandy that much. gives me a headache. i'd go for vodka, cognac, or tequila.

 

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